ITALIA ANCORA!!

I am so madly overwhelmed with joy to announce this that I just don’t know where to start!

Christmas morning, digging deeper and deeper into my stocking, I uncovered a tiny envelope. Inside, a ticket to Ancona via Roma leaving on Jan 2!!!

Voilà, nothing more. I’m all joyed up to the brim. I’m not sure when I am going to post again, tomorrow, after tomorrow, maybe where I have my layover, who knows?!?

Ciao tutti!!! And long live exclamation points!!!!!!!

SATC

"Who is this?"

"Billie Holiday. The only woman I can think of in more pain than you right now."


Nothing is more depressing then having nothing to look forward to. Winter can end now, I shall gladly retire my scarves for sun.

all dried up

"How about you? Ain't you wacked out with bitterness? Don't you see no stars gleamin' that you can't reach out and grab? I am a volcano, I'm a giant and I'm surrounded by ants. Ants that don't even know what I'm talkin about! How's that?" - Walter Younger, A Raisin in the Sun

Thank you, Miss Hansberry.

ILOVEJULIA!

..only Carine could produce such lovely bones

informato

sometimes, every so often, i look around myself and i do not recognize my life. these people around me that i take for granted as being my friends, i don't recognize them. it's funny how people just spring up into existance in your life and you barely even notice. you just take it in stride and the next thing you know, your life is full of strangers that are somehow familiar faces. it's disconcerting. change is a quiet event.

l'estate

John

anymore dreams?

9:18amTaryn

YES

funny that you ask

9:19amTaryn

two nights ago eric calls me at 3 am, he forgot his keys and was just getting in from a show...

9:19amJohn

right.

9:19amTaryn

i answer my cell but i have NO idea where i am. i'm looking, eyes open, at my own room. i'm saying to him, "pete, the plane is leaving? we need our luggage from the hotel...we can't leave without the luggage from the hotel."

9:20amJohn

i miss you

so much

haha

9:20amTaryn

i miss you too, i'm going fucking crazy

9:20amJohn

well i woke up at 4 a.m. the other night. forgot where i was. and this morning i woke up ready to walk onto a terrace?... but there wasnt one, so i realized this and sat back down.

i felt like an idiot.

youre not alone.

9:21amTaryn

really?

9:21amJohn

yeah

9:21amTaryn

its terrible, i was so confused, and sad. really sad.

9:22amJohn

yeah, this morning i got real dizzy with the terrace thing

9:22amTaryn

i thought i needed a cat scan after the whole episode with the fever dream in urbino...

ah, nesting...

when seriously considering future living necessities, the following has always been of importance:

1) a(nother) roomy closet 

2) victorian bath tub

3) a library/reading room for the shit ton of books i hoard

(so i totally googled "beauty and the beast library" for this last one...but isn't it so pretty!?)

pulling out

"In order to know one must always go back."  Gertrude Stein, Plays

I finally caved and deleted my myspace today. I never use it, but I still feel sorta sad. Yeah, thats right, I said it, sad. I guess I'll post photos that were on there that won't make it on facebook. I'm hip enough to understand that internet wouldn't be as fun without everyone hanging their human out for everyone else to see.

tan babes

ah, just as I lose interest..

..a photo emerges, rekindling my fondness for coiffed loose curls, pale skin and an affinity for my own, organic self.

photograph credit to the always fabulous garance dore.

if ever i run for office..or something

powdering your nose all night at a best friends wedding. also, you're a bridesmaid.

for matthew

The kitchen sink has been clogged for days, some utensil probably fell down there.
And the Drano won't work but smells dangerous, and the crusty dishes have piled up

waiting for the plumber I still haven't called. This is the everyday we spoke of.
It's winter again: the sky's a deep, headstrong blue, and the sunlight pours through

the open living-room windows because the heat's on too high in here and I can't turn it off.
For weeks now, driving, or dropping a bag of groceries in the street, the bag breaking,

I've been thinking: This is what the living do. And yesterday, hurrying along those
wobbly bricks in the Cambridge sidewalk, spilling my coffee down my wrist and sleeve,

I thought it again, and again later, when buying a hairbrush: This is it.
Parking. Slamming the car door shut in the cold. What you called that yearning.

What you finally gave up. We want the spring to come and the winter to pass. We want
whoever to call or not call, a letter, a kiss--we want more and more and then more of it.

But there are moments, walking, when I catch a glimpse of myself in the window glass,
say, the window of the corner video store, and I'm gripped by a cherishing so deep

for my own blowing hair, chapped face, and unbuttoned coat that I'm speechless:
I am living. I remember you.

new fav (my scanner sucks)

i fantasize this being akin to a modern hepburn-peppard. so gorgeous.